I was with my high school crush for the last 4 years after a 20 year break of not seeing or hearing from one another. I thought the stars finally aligned and the perfect woman for me entered my life. We both had broken paths and I felt as if anybody would accept and love me for the struggles it would have been her.

I supported She and her three teenagers while she stayed at home for 3 years. Within 6 Months of a new job (where her self esteem has gone through the roof) She asked me to leave. She refuses to reconcile and everything confused me at first. Now I am realizing that she is simply feeding off of the energy she is receiving from work, both sexually and intellectually. I also realized that She has repeated this exact pattern no less than 4 times (all of 4 years each).

So in the end after 30 days of crying, second guessing myself, etc. I came to realize that she simply is crazy and it wasn't me at all. I wanted it to be me.... I can fix me! Unfortunately I came to realize that I cannot save her from herself. It is unreal how someone can get control of you...

The game is afoot....welcome to the new world.

I just couldn't put my finger on it. She has been hurt repeatedly and in the end She turned out to be a narcissist.

I hoped to save her... to show her that she could trust.....
I am now realizing thanks to the videos on you tube what exactly was going on.

I gave up my home, my dog, my friends, my job..... all for "family" and love.
What I got in the end was a trail of unhappy evenings but the love of her three teenage boys.

I had to finally realize that her condition is not only definable, it is down right scary that I tried so hard with such a person.

its amazing how ur view of people change when u wake up and watch the videos and learn the truth. at school this past year there was this latino woman who was just breathtaking. big boobs, soft long black hair, beautiful woman. and she looked to be about my age. i decided to wait and kinda watch from the background to get little by little details about herself. when me and her finally got to talking i learned she was in her mid 30s with 4 boys with 4 different husbands, and that she was currently married. when i heard "married" i did a 180 on my chair and got up and left. it was obvious she was a cheater because just from talking to her once she was getting really close to me and her tone of voice was....mesmerizing lol. she was even wearing a shirt that gave u a clear view of her huge cleavage. i knew it was wrong so yes i spun my chair around and got up and left. this was before i knew anything about narcs. in the end my sense of right and wrong saved me from a WORLD of disaster. after i learned about narcs and all of that stuff i reflected and realized that this woman WAS a big time narc. used her current husbands savings for her boys college funds and opened her own business. and on facebook always posting photos of her girls nights out on weekends. she has taken over 4 vacations this summer. i havent taken one in over a year lol. so yes, she had narc written all over her.now that i know all that i have learned about this topic im staying away from her. i am a firm believer of the power of knowledge, it gives us direction and closes doors we DO NOT need to go through.

IF
IF you can keep your head when all about you Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, But make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired by waiting, Or being lied about, don't deal in lies, Or being hated, don't give way to hating, And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master; If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim; If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster And treat those two impostors just the same; If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, And lose, and start again at your beginnings And never breathe a word about your loss; If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew To serve your turn long after they are gone, And so hold on when there is nothing in you Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch, If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, If all men count with you, but none too much; If you can fill the unforgiving minute With sixty seconds' worth of distance run, Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it, And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

Kipling

what is it about breasts that attract us men anyways? and when these women are onto you you feel great, yet blinded. fun fact, when two humans get "close" the body releases its feel good fluids calls endorphins. this same chemical is used when a mother holds her child and the child feels safe. also when u cut urself your body releases this to kinda numb the pain until u get proper medical attention. maybe thats why narcs are always so horny and want sex all the time, and also cuz themselves on the arm.and yes beatentoapulp, although the temptation is there and seems so easy all u have to do is reach out and grab it, its not worth it. BUT U CAN STILL APPRECIATE THE VIEW