Hello All,

I guess maybe I am just writing this because I am not sure what to do here. Two weeks ago i left a woman who was very abusive. It took me years to see it but eventually i saw her for what she was.

We were on and off for years, until eventually she talked me into moving out of my place and in with her family. This is where the gloves came off and she was continuously shouting at me, calling me names, more or less telling me I was crazy, etc. I was about to leave until her daughter(Who I have been raising as her mother seems to be unable to connect with her or manage her life. She wouldn't wash her clothes or get up with her for school.) confided in me that this woman's father, my land lord had been molesting her(until I moved in.)

While he went to prison and after we went through two years of court battles and during this the abuse against me continued as I did everything to help keep a roof over our heads and worked to get us out of this mess. She spent money like it was water and I felt like I had to handle everything. I even started helping her through beauty school(She seems unable to keep a job and drags her feet about looking for one.)

Once it was over and MY plan to save our necks was successful and she didn't need me anymore, to make matters worse, she started dating an old high school friend of mine and got him completely on her side and they ambushed me about my 'behavior.' I tried to talk rationally about it but neither of them would listen, (She does this mocking laugh thing and also resorts to name calling etc unless I admit I am this terrible person in her life) My friend seems pretty much on her side. She also claims we had 'all these conversations." none of which remember and a few I know were just lies which she defends and he, the dutiful white knight defends with her.

In the end, when she was screaming and throwing cigarettes at me because I asked for one(I bought most if not all of the smokes but I am not allowed to have any is just one of her 'rules.") When I tried to defend myself she called me a compulsive liar, said I didn't care about her and how she wanted me gone,(But I didn't have to move out, she wanted me gone more than she could say but I didn't have to leave?) I realize what she was and said to hell with this and left. I am living with a friend of mine and am still trying to rebuild my life. He noticed how I seemed to be terrified everyone was mad at me on the first night I was there.

She is still tolerating me seeing her daughter(Since it is far easier for me to supervise and take care of her than her as she begins this whirlwind relationship with my former friend. They are all ready planning to move in together and get 'married.")

She has a therapist so do I, but she said her therapist is completely on my side and is going to talk to mine, probably carrying the same Kool aid she is feeding everyone about how I am the antichrist. I all ready revoked permission for my therapist to talk to hers but I am terrified to go see my own therapist now. I also seem to feel like a worthless wretch.

Any advice you can off would be great.

mine left me again for a guy she cheated on me with. luckily she doesnt like me that much so she can only last with me for a few months. but that makes me think im ugly and undesirable. shes acting like shes soulmates now with this guy she keeps leaving me for. im pretty sure shes spending all his money on acid, extacy, and weed. hes a methhead both get funding from the gov to live on. two filthy druggies in a small apartment harassing the neighbors, doing drugs, and having sex, at everyone's expense lol.

i dont have any advice. im still obsessed with her cause i dont have anyone else and i hate knowing this guy is having her now. im trying to break them up. not very successful. she got everyone to hate me but i think when she wouldnt shut up about all the ways she wants o kill me that people realized shes not scared of me and a total psycho. so at least they know now because of me shes evil.

so yeah i gotta watch out with this girl of mine too cause i know she will date anyone out of jealousy or to send me into a rage to hurt me. gotta keep these women away from any guy you know and not trust any guy you know either. male friends are enemies when you have women around.

Having read your story I feel for you.

A lot of points jumped out at me as I'm sure they have for a lot of the other guys.

Telling you to leave and get out her life. Mine would do that and when it tried she'd either cry and beg me not too or get violent, hit me, rip the clothes off my back and throw heavy objects at me. All the while calling me nasty names they wre totally unappropriate. Later on though she would phone me continuously begging for me to some home. Probably because she didn't want to be alone. They can't EVER be on their own it's absolutely pathetic.

Her turning your old friend against you. One night mine got so drunk on a night out with her friends, they called me asking me to pick her up because she was out of control. I rushed down three in my car and got her in the car she repeatedly punched me in the face calling me a nasty horrible person, busting open my lips and nose. If I wanted to I could have knocked her spark out but I always promised myself I'd never hit a woman after I saw my dad beat my mother. Those perticular friends that night found out what she did to me that night and saw her for what she was and never spoke to her again.

With other people though, she'd tell them all my secrets and business and make out I was a really bad guy. When I was in the good books though she'd make out I was the archangel Gabriel. It's all black and white.exceptional or terrible. All or nothing. ONe end of the scale to the other.