I need a bit of advice. It was watching James' video on youtube that reminded me of so many of my wife's traits. I met her 8 years ago and she was instantly very keen and wanting me to move in. I walked out early on in the relationship because she refused to have anything to do with my son from a previous relationship due to perceived sleights from his mother. She also disliked my mother with whom I am close. Here we are years later and over the past two years she has been hell. When I wanted to go back to uni to study nursing she virtually forced me to leave the marital home. She would throw my things around, accuse me of all sorts of things, physically assaulted me, claimed to her brother that I had hit her in the face (I am 14.6 stones and and have competed in MMA and BJJ). I removed the phone from her ear one day to hang up when she was badmouthing me to her friend. She locked me out and threatened to call the Police. She would call me names and accuse me of things in from of our step son who was 15 at the time. After I left she demanded money on a monthly basis as she claimed to be struggling, I then find out she has bought new clothes and a £600 computer for her son. She hasn't told her parents I am not at the house and lies to them. I have moved back in with my mother whilst I finish university. She accuses me of studying nursing to be around women??? She refuses still to have anything to do with my son. I have caught her sending naked pics of herself to two males and arranging to meet them although she claims that nothing has happened. I try to ignore her but she texts every day, she tries to make me jealous and when I caught her cheating claimed that she "wasn't bothered".
Written down it may seem obvious and I want out but I feel emotionally trapped….. its the strangest feeling….

Hi,

I think you already answered your question.

Don't take anything she says personal, it is all lies and badmouthing with the only goal to make you feel bad. That is how narcs control others: by manipulating their feelings.

It's all pretty sad, when you look at it from a third person perspective..

Grow distance from her emotionally, so she can not hurt you anymore.

I would also suggest to stop being her sugar daddy, and stop paying for her stuff.

Gather all evidence you can of previous conversations, and all proof you have of her cheating and buying stuff, it will help tremendously if she goes to the police/court.

Be strong, this is a hurdle in your life, but it is one that can be overcome.

Jack

Thanks Jack. I have already stopped with the money. She blames everything she does on others and sets of circumstances that are clearly fantasy. She can't take responsibility and it blows my mind trying to follow her logic, she isn't the person I met but I suppose the warning signs were all there.

Based on what you just said - yes.

You are married to a narcissist *****. Everything you said there I have been through. Apart from I don't have children and I do boxing not mma, apart from that it's like it was written about me. These *****es are bed seeds. Don't let it continue mine has pushed me to some limits. Good luck, my friend.