I have been married to a younger woman for 18 years and the abuse have been the worst thing I have ever experienced.I told her a lot about my life and she uses anything she can to put me down and keep me down.She started out seperating me from my Family and Friends and she pretended to love me. She couldnt wait to get married and pressured me everyday because she is a Preacher and a Nurse she couldnt live with anyone she had to be Married. She talks down to me and says things to me like, you are ugly,you are a wrinked up old man,you dont have anything to work with and go on to talk about men who do like Ray J .She hates my biological son and wont let me visit my one year old Granddaughter. I was married before and my step daughter was 5 years old and I raised her ,gave her away at her wedding,was there for her first baby and she wont let me visit or let them visit me.My Granddaughter just had a baby girl and I cant go see her.She Preaches at the church my Daughter is a member so she got a chance to hold the baby and took a picture for me to see.She makes up lies and if I try in anyway to talk with her she goes off ang say I talk to her it's the same as talking with God.She wont let me out of her site she wants me to sit around her while she talks on the phone but if anyone call me she become enraged for weeks and sometimes longer.She tells me most women dont marry a old man unless he have lots of money.She wanted me to take out a million dollars insurance because she would be very hurt for a while but the money would certainly help.I am ashamed to go out with her but she like dragging me along so she can have someone to fuss at.She say I have lived my life and she is going to live her's.She loves her son and daughter and their children and the children love me and I love them but she hates anyone I know.Could this woman be a narcissist ? WHEN i SAY MY THROAT HURTS she says so do hers but she dont like complaining.She have hid all the money away and u ses every penny I get but tells me she want me out of her house,our house.I have lost all desire for her and she says I should have married a man and I am jelousy of her and want to be her,she thinks everyone is jelosy of her and she is superior to other people and look down on less fortunate people.She talks with this Bishop everyday and he upholds her.I want to leave but I have no money,I am stuck.Someone please talk with me.Thanks Otey

Otey,

You're married to a golddigger.

She's guarding you for your money, and probably waits for inheritance time. That's why she cuts you off from the world, you are her walking financial future, and she will go far to protect that.

From here on, you will have to start going undercover.
You need to set some money aside for yourself, to have some backup for when you will leave.

Ask your family for support, you will need it.

Once you saved enough, leave while she is not at home, and never look back. Do not leave any trace, she will come after you if she has any clue where you are.

To work yourself up, educate yourself on emotional abuse, it is the weapon she uses to control you. You will be better able to understand what is going on, and seeing through the fog she creates.

Do not show anger towards her, just know that you are preparing your leave. Any anger will just make her suspicious and jeopardize your future freedom.

That's for starters. Hang in there, you are not alone.


Jack

Thanks Jack, I really appreciate your help.

This woman does not love you. She despises you, and she likely is filled with self hatred too- abusers tend to tear down other people to elivate their own sense of self worth.

I just escaped from an emotionally abusive woman after a few months- had i stayed, she might have broken nme, and would have destroyed me.


You will never know happiness again unless you get out of that situation. Despite her claims, it is YOUR life and you deserve to be happy

Her violence frightened me. She always claimed that I was the jealous one, and I was often jealous, but when I saw things working against me I simply became disgusted and withdrew. Lydia was different. She reacted. She was the Head Cheerleader at the Game of Violence.

Charles Bukowski, Women

The only salvation with this type lies in fleeing. Get out while you can.

Otey

LEAVE

Even if you have to sneak out the door in the middle of the night.

She is a Classic NPD.

She is going to use you up and throw you over her shoulder like an empty Coke can.
Its only a matter of time.

I recommend recording some of her behavior and words as proof .

BUT GET OUT !FLEE RUN!

This is no way for you to be treated or live.

Dont allow people to treat you this way.